


Spectrum of Memories

by PerseusHuntress



Category: Mass Effect Trilogy
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, F/M, Friendship, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-03
Updated: 2018-12-03
Packaged: 2019-09-06 14:00:27
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 838
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16834039
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PerseusHuntress/pseuds/PerseusHuntress





	Spectrum of Memories

‘Do you really think this is a good idea?’ she asked without looking up from the console. 

‘Probably not, but we need this Shepard. Desperately’ Liara looked over at the human, who was oblivious to the emotions that her presence stirred in Liara. 

Once, Shepard’s rescues irked her, that Liara wanted to do it alone and come out on top. That Liara perished when the Normandy was destroyed by the Collectors. Now Shepard’s arrival and presence was a comfort to her. Knowing that someone always had her back, even with everything that has happened between them. Shepard’s death, Cerberus, the Shadow Broker, has done nothing to stop Shepard coming back, helping. In a galaxy shot to hell, where destruction and death were just behind the veil, that trust gave her strength to go on. 

A long time ago, Shepard and Liara melded minds, but in that brief connection Liara saw a glimpse of who Shepard really was. It was unintentional, the purpose was to share the images from the beacon after Virmire, but the bleed of other, restricted thoughts and feelings was inescapable. Even the asari Matriarchs had difficulty totally controlling the melding, what chance did Liara, a child at the time, have against the bleed. 

She never told Shepard what she witnessed in her mind, in that brief moment. But it changed the way that Liara saw the Commander forever. It was personal, raw, and Liara never shared it with anyone, Shepard didn’t even realise what happened. 

She remembered Shepard’s mind vividly, you never forget something like that, whilst shapeless, and at times indecipherable, the feelings, secrets and emotion the Commander’s mind conveyed were colossal, no one knew Shepard quite like Liara did, or ever will. 

Pure agony pulsed through Shepard, raw, scratching, screaming. Images of Ashley swam before Liara. Pictures of Ash laughing, smiling, reciting Tennyson were intermingled with howls of pain. In its quieter moments, Shepard’s mind wrote the same words over and over again ‘not one more, not single one more, never again’ they swirled and crawled over the Normandy and her crew, suffocating them, drowning out light. 

Once they disconnected from each other, Liara was unable to take her eyes of Shepard, the world before her was disconnected ringing with dissonance. The woman in front of her was calm, collected, issuing orders, asking her something. Nothing betrayed the Commander, not even her eyes reflected the storms that were ravaging her on the inside. 

The asari managed to extricate herself, by feigning illness. Alone in her room the after flashes came. Less distinct than when they were connected but vivid enough, like old memories bubbling up to the surface, blurred but expressive. 

The revelations came fast. Shepard’s diplomacy was hard won in a battle against herself. The Commander’s first impulse was aggression, a revenant of the tragedy on Mindoir. It honed her fight instinct to precision. ‘Fight, resist…’ then control took over ‘slower, slower, calmer, quieter…’. She hated that part of herself, the draw of impulse, the rage caustic in her. She would breathe and resolution would kick in, diplomacy, compassion understanding would flow. The edifices of Midoir would over hang her every move and she would fight to the end for control. 

More flashes. This time they are lighter, kinder, brilliant blue eyes blurred at the sclera, but the irises are piercing. The images shift, graceful movements of indistinct hands, dancing along an omni tool, ‘STOP’ Shepard’s mind commands. The images fade. Then flare up with such brilliance that Liara cannot even comprehend what they mean, just warmth emanating from them, and an odd fragrance of sweetness and metal, the irises flare and die again. 

The last blaze, the dancing hands. Gliding gracefully, working on something, material hitches, with deft moments of the nimble fingers buttons come undone, fabric falls away revealing freckled skin, Shepard’s skin. The images shatter, ‘stop, now, not going to happen…’ the commanding tone of the mind is gone, replaced with begging. 

Coming back to her own mind was like stepping into a cold shower. Liara didn’t know what to do with this information, she stared at her screen, her blue eyes reflecting back at her, treacherous youth whispering, craving, demanding. 

‘Liara, are you okay?’ Shepard was looking at her with concern. 

The asari snapped back to the present, and saw genuine distress in Shepard’s eyes. A smile crossed her lips. 

‘Yes, sorry Shepard, just got lost in the memories, and something just connected’ the sly smile rested easily on her face. 

Shepard stared at her in blank confusion. 

Liara smirked back. ‘Oh you know, I’ve just been thinking about Garrus, he really does have some extraordinary nimble fingers. They must be very useful outside the battle field too’.

Shepard’s face coloured and her freckles became even more prominent. 

‘I, you, do you mean… the calibrations?’ Shepard found a surer footing.’The thanix would not have not worked half as well without him. We’d all be dead.’

Liara laughed, ‘I am talking about calibrations, but of a different kind’.


End file.
